Prejudice, Racism, Stereotypes

•August 8, 2010 • 1 Comment

Prejudice : A prejudgment: i.e. a preconceived belief, opinion, or judgment made without recourse to reason

When you think of someone being prejudice what usually comes to mind? What causes someone to have such strong prejudice beliefs about certain people with specific characteristics?

Stereotypes are something we come across everyday. Our minds are at a constant battle between what we think and what we try not to think, because we know morally the thoughts may be wrong. Of course we can’t help certain thoughts that pop into our minds when we see people of a certain race, social class, or even sexual orientation. Sometimes the thought may spark a harmless joke or statement to yourself or the people you are with. But are they really harmless? What do these thought to be harmless jokes really say about the things that go on subconsciously in our minds?

Whether we accept the fact or not we all have stereotypical thoughts about people of different races. This does not make us racists but it does prove that we all have a certain extent of prejudice views.

What do we have to blame on these thoughts? Do they come from were we were raised, what our parents taught us, how we grew up? If a four year old white child tells a black child he can’t play with him because he’s brown, this is obviously the fault of the parents of the white child. It is not the white child’s fault for thinking and expressing the thought of not wanting to play with the black child. Most of the prejudice views come from past experiences, would there be so many stereotypical thoughts about Arabs/Muslims if it weren’t for the attacks on 9/11?
Next time you have a pre-conceived notion about a race of people, sexual orientation, or religious background think about what cause you to think that way. And remember that not one person can be judged by someone else’s actions. We are all humans and we are all different.

At the end of the day no one can judge us but God.

Wisdom Vs Knowledge: What’s the Difference?

•August 8, 2010 • Leave a Comment

Wisdom (noun): The trait of utilizing knowledge and experience with common sense and insight.

Knowledge (noun): The psychological result of perception and learning and reasoning.

It is a known fact that throughout life we learn many things. These things can be categorized by knowledge or wisdom.Whether they are facts, opinions, or theories, these things can dwell in our minds from the span of a week to an entire lifetime. Some may change our lives forever, some we may teach to our children or even our grandchildren, and some may get us no further than next week’s pop quiz. But what draws the thin line between wisdom and knowledge?

Take a trip into your memory bank – have you ever come across someone who had a 4.0 GPA or higher, then spent some time with them outside of the classroom and realized they were completely oblivious to all types of common sense? There are many logical explanations to this, but a major one is because of a sheltered childhood. Having parents that suffocate you to the point that you are unable to get out of the house to learn things on your own rather than being lectured, can have a negative effect on a person’s future.

In this day and age, knowledge is something that is becoming easier and easier to obtain. This is because of increase in technology, financial aid funds, racial equality, and many more advances as the years pass. But does simply memorizing facts out of a book give you true wisdom?

Wisdom comes from experience. It’s a combination of knowledge, experience, and common sense. It is easy to forget something you had once memorized, but so much harder to forget an experience you once had. It is impossible to have wisdom without knowledge, but it is possible to have knowledge without wisdom.

We all know that the older we get, the wiser we become. As we look throughout history, the wisest of our past have had many great experiences that brought them that sense of wisdom.

Don’t let a degree give you a reason to tell people you are wise. College does not teach you common sense, your experiences do.

Heart Vs Mind – Why Do We Make Exceptions?

•July 27, 2010 • 1 Comment

Love is one of the most confusing emotions a human can deal with. It causes us to do certain things we’d never even imagine doing while single. One of the negative things about this is that it does, as some would say, blind us.

Sometimes we wonder why girls/guys stay with people who don’t necessarily treat them as great as they should, and it even seems as if the person who is in this so-called love is oblivious to the fact that they are being treated like crap.

One thing love can cause us to do is make exceptions, sometimes extreme exceptions. Love is an emotion that deals with the heart, and when we start to confuse our brains with our emotions, it is possible to lose our sense of common sense and reality. This is a major reason why we have the ability to stay with someone with an extremely small number of good qualities that are majorly outweighed by all of the negative character traits the person may have. We try our hardest to ignore all of the immature, disrespectful, irresponsible, and selfish ways of a significant other just because we are so focused on the one or two small positive traits that person may have.

It may not be logical, but when your “under the influence” of love or what you may think might be love, it’s difficult to understand what you’re really doing.

At times its best that we take a minute to step back, so we can think with our brains instead of our hearts.

Why Do Attractive Women Get Cheated On The Most?

•July 12, 2010 • 10 Comments

A common question people ask whether in their minds or out loud is, “Why do men cheat on pretty girls?” After some conversations on the subject and some deep thoughts about it, it caused me to ponder on it. Why DO men cheat on attractive women? How come there are so many normal – “uglier” women who seem to be in happier relationships with faithful men?

One of the main reasons attractive women get cheated on so much is that attractive women attract the most men who care solely about looks. This is a huge contributing factor because a lot of attractive women are lazy, or feel they might be too good to approach a man, so they pick the man to have a relationship with out of the guys who have already approached them. Basically choosing the best out of the worst.

Sometimes you have to make an effort to get the better guys. Good guys are not truly infatuated with looks and will not chase a girl just because he sees other guys are doing it. He will not be a woman’s groupie.

As women we sometimes like to think that every guy we should talk to or build a relationship with should approach us or chase us down. This is not true and is what can cause difficulties when it comes to finding the right guy who will be faithful.

One of the other big reasons is that some ladies would rather be with a gorgeous, arrogant guy who treats them like crap then be with a decent looking man who would treat her right and give her the world. Looks are not everything; just because he looks good doesn’t mean he is right for you!

The point I’m trying to make to women is to stop being so lazy. You don’t have to choose the guy you want to be with out of the guys who approach you, also just because a guy asks you for your number, doesn’t mean you need to give it to him. Good things come with patience and work so put some effort into the next guy you decide to be with and see how big of a difference it can make.

Are you what you wear?

•July 8, 2010 • 5 Comments

When you go shopping what do you look for; brand names, styles, colors, or patterns? What attracts you to the clothing that you like to wear? Do you like to dress conservative or are you more comfortable showing a lot of skin?
Now lets flip it. When you look at people, one of the first things you can’t help but notice is what they are wearing. It is the only thing other than their physicalities that is noticeable to the eye.
Judging someone by what they wear is something that is inevitable. You can’t help but notice what they have on and it doesn’t help at all that it’s the only thing you can see about them visually that they CAN help.
For instance, if you’re a female that seems to attract guys who want you for sex and sex only, this is most likely because of how you are representing yourself. Take some thought into how you portray yourself… do you represent yourself in a sexual way? Clothes that reveal almost EVERYTHING and leave nothing to the imagination do not help you seem like a classier, wife-able woman nor does it give the allusion that you have self-respect.
Also if you are an attractive woman with self-confidence, you don’t need to broadcast yourself so much by wearing very little clothing. You can still wear clothes and be attractive and men will respect you much more if you do. No man wants a girlfriend who is constantly half naked showing her body to men that are not him.
Moral of the story is take thought into what you invest in while your shopping because you only have ONE first impression.

Is That REALLY You? Weave Detection 101

•July 8, 2010 • 3 Comments

I know quite a few men who have asked me if my hair was real or if it was a weave, and my answer was no. I personally have never worn a weave, but that does not change the fact that black women represent the largest female demographic to purchase weaves, wigs and hairpieces, despite the ironic fact that black women comprise only 13 percent of the total female population in the United States.

Weave Detection 101 –

The Pat Test – So you’re on a date and you’re looking at the weave but can’t quite figure out if it’s real or not. I mean to you it looks real, but as she’s going on talking about who knows what your staring at it thinking, “Girl is that yo hair or what?!” but, of course you don’t wanna ask her because you’re not trying to get hit in the head with some Jimmy Choos.. So this is what you do (listen closely); whenever you have the chance to get close to her, put your arm around her… don’t be clumsy and bump her head because if it’s a wig or weave it just might fly off. Now gently stroke her hair as she’s talking, if you can feel MAJOR BUMPS in her head it’s fake. If she backhands you in the face for touching her hair, its fake. If she flinches like she absolutely doesn’t want you touching her hair, it’s fake.

Braids – Not too many guys know this put if you see a woman with a whole bunch of little braids in her hair they are fake. These are called ‘Micro braids’, there is also a style called kinky twists, which are similar but twists rather then braids that curl up at the end. These are also fake. Also if she’s got cornrows and you see a big knot where it starts, there is weave up in there.

Stiff Observation – Only fairly good weaves & wigs  blow in the wind or move as the female moves… so if she is in a windy area and everything is blowing in the wind except her hair, it’s fake.

Extremely Long If she’s got hair that’s  past her waistline, 9.9 times out of 10 it’s not her hair.

Way Too Shiny If her hair seems to be extremely shiny, (I’m talking OD almost like an Asian woman’s hair) it’s not hers. Especially if you can see the difference between some of her roots that look dull and maybe a diff color shade than the body & ends of her hair.

These are just a few points that you can use if your afraid to ask her. Even though asking is the most legitimate way to find out it’s not always the easiest. If she is mixed with Latino, Caucasian, Asian, or Arabic then some of these rules might not apply. Other then that, don’t be suprised if you wake up next to Amber Rose after you fell asleep with Beyonce (who’s, might I add, hair is also fake).

A Look Into His Mind…. what do men really want?

•July 6, 2010 • Leave a Comment

As women we like to think we generally know what men like about us and dislike about us, but do we really? What do men really look for in a wife/girlfriend?  I interviewed 7 gentleman to get a closer idea…

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First lets take a look on who @FawkYoInk, thinks the most attractive celeb is & his opinions on women wanting kids:

Q – What celebrity are you attracted to most and why? —His answer was – “Alicia Keys – she does everything sexy without the “Sex sales tag look”. I’m not a Big fan of R&B but she seems to catch my ear. She also seems like down to earth woman that would be great to start something with.”

Q – Do you think a female you’re settling down with should want to have kids, and how many?          —His answer was – “Of course she should want to have kids. I don’t have any so far and I’m looking forward to being a father, I think it brings maturity. I only want two kids, a boy and a girl so I can experience both sides of parenthood.”

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Ok lets mosey on down to @U_Follow_Me_1st and his favorite characteristics in a female and what he HATES for a girlfriend to do in a relationship

Q – Character traits you look for in a girl?

—His answer was – “Someone who can make me laugh, independent & care-free person yet serious when the time calls for being serious & knows what she wants in life.”

Q – What would you hate for a girl to do in a relationship?

—His answer was – “Hide things from me.”

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Let’s take a look at @Evry1HatesChrs’s thoughts on age & what he thinks the most important thing every woman should have:

Q – How do you feel about age, is it really just a number?
—His answer was – “Age is just a number for the most part cause somebody whose 18 can be just as mature as a 25 yr old & a 25 yr old can be just as immature as an 18 yr old…So age is overrated sometimes. Me personally I wouldn’t date anybody under 18 for obvious reasons & I think 30-33 would be my range for older even though there’s some fine ass older woman. If u start dating any older she going to be the same age as ur parents or she might got kids a few years younger than u and that ain’t cool. ”

Q – What do you think is the most important thing a woman should have? — His answer was – “A woman gotta have a good personality and have a sense of humor. There’s always goin to be someone who looks better than the girl you’re with but personality is key. She can’t be stuck up or think she better than me. Just be down to earth n not stress or worry bout every little thing that goes on.”

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Let’s open up @EatRonzilla‘s thoughts regarding sex & what guys like & don’t like:

Q – Do you think constant sex is a definite necessity in a relationship?   —His answer was – “Yes, I believe even though we’re humans, we’re also animals in the end. Sex is natural and not some craze that stated thousands of years ago. Bacteria reproduce with each other. A relationship is one person taking care of all your needs. Sex is a need!”

Q – What are two things you want females to know about what guys really like and don’t like?      ––His answer was – “We won’t admit this, but we all want someone that listens to us. Also we don’t like hearing what you don’t do!”

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Now let’s take a peak inside of @Infin1te’s mind

Q – Do you have a preference of race? 

—His answer was – “NO”

Q -How do you feel about females with tattoos? Good or Bad? Attractive?

—His answer was – “I don’t care either way..As long as it doesn’t take away from their natural beauty and they actually mean something. I don’t like females caught up in “Images” and “Fads” period”

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Of course we can’t forget about @KineticalDummy’s biggest turn off & physical turn on.

Q –Turn off?

—His answer was – “My Biggest turn off that females do is trying to ‘’Get Attention’’ in all different kinds of methods. Well some boys are in fact stupid, they might cheat on their lady in a relationship and she might want to make him feel jealous so she would do the same even though she doesn’t want to do it but she’s doing it just for the sake of making him feel jealous as well. Start sleeping around with different men and get called a prostitute just in name of trying to make her real man feel jealous. Other things that most females do that is a turn off as far as I’m concerned is hating on other females, it might be because they are much more successful that they are or they know how to do something they cannot, it is really wrong stop doing it. This problem should be solved when most woman commence being original again.”

Q – Turn on? Physically? —His answer was – “My biggest turn on in a female physically is like……. I would say the whole body, because if you like a female for a part of their body maybe if it’s their face, what if they got burnt or something? You’d leave them and that’s an infatuation love. It doesn’t really have to be the face or the breasts or whatever some times. A Good woman with a good body and a bad personality is like an expensive vehicle with no tyres to move it around. I  would prefer a female with a good personality and Natural beauty.”

Last but certainly not least, Lets take a look at @blakeandthecity and his responses to these two questions:

Q – What are some morals/goals/ambitions you think a female should have in
order for you to settle down with her?

—His answer was – “First and foremost class and respect for herself and others. Self respect is huge because not a great many women in my age group have that quality about themselves nowadays. Thus, the rarity of it makes it THAT much more appealing to me. Along with those things an overall passion for achieving her own successes. Everyone’s personal success is specific to the individual and I would like her to be dedicated to the achievement of whatever it is she desires to do or be. Her drive would in turn, drive my own ambitions. Someone who can match and compliment me in that way would be ideal to settle down with.”

Q – How do you feel about religion, do you think your woman should have a strong belief in God, does it matter to you?

—His answer was – “Religion is a MAJOR part of my own life and realistically I would want a partner to share that aspect. I grew up in a strong Christian background and have a great deal of faith in my belief. Religion is the glue that holds me together in times where life becomes difficult to understand and manage. I would be in shambles without it. Having a woman that believes in God and humble enough to serve God as I do is a no brainer for me. That may be the most critical aspect of a solid foundation of a relationship with me.”

As you can see, it is always possible to learn MORE. Listen to some of the things these guys said. Also follow them!